Thursday, September 18

The Rest of the Awful Story...

I know I said I would post this tomorrow, but some people are like me and don't like to wait.
If you haven't read the first half of the story, go down and read it first or you will be confused.


So Monday I am checking Kale's email, this time he asked me to do it. He doesn't have internet at his house and he can't check his personal email on the work computer. So I check it and there is this email about "So and so commented on your picture on Redlightcenter.com". So I am naturally curious so I go to the site, type in Kale's gmail address in the forgotten password space, retrieve it and sign in. I am immediately HORRIFIED BEYOND BELIEF! The first thing I see is a picture of Kale and I together. This picture:




His mom took it when they came to visit him the summer we began dating. It's Kale's favorite picture of the two of us.


The website I find is kind of like a myspace or facebook page, but it's designed for people seeking sexual "release" I guess you would call it. Basically you can be single or a couple seeking other singles or couples to do things with. Or it can just be an online, look at each others nasty pictures and videos. The entire page had been set up as if Kale had done it himself. I know now he didn't, but at the time....not so much.


Again I freak out, worse than the day before, because not only did it sound as if Kale had written the page himself (I will tell you why later) but there were also pictures. Pictures of male genitalia. One of the pictures was actually my husbands, but he took it to send to me (don't know why) and he never did. The other two pictures of genitalia I could tell weren't his which is good, because one of them was completely nasty. I will not describe it for you, but it was dirty, filthy, and it haunts my dreams. That right there was Kale's only saving grace.


He called me about 25 agonizing minutes after I found this page. I had gone from screeching crying, to hyperventilating, to collapsing on the floor in grief. I managed to keep it together when Sophia came downstairs to find out what was wrong and I was lucky Delilah was sleeping. Anyhow, he calls and I am screaming things at him like you would not believe. He is swearing up and down that it wasn't him. All the same things as the time before. He swears on the lives of our children and I feel a little, not much, but a little better. He tells me he and the 1SG are going to go talk to the guy again and they will find out what is going on for me. I tell him I can't believe him, I need to hear it from the 1SG (his boss) when they get back. Otherwise I knew I would always have doubts.


After about another hour of agonizing wait, during which I can't eat and have diarrhea (TMI I know, but at this point I have shared everything else). He calls and puts the 1SG on. He lets me know the guy confessed and is writing a swore statement about all the things he did and why he did them. The guy said he used Kale's pictures because he didn't want his wife to be able to find out he did this. That everyone on the site requires pictures and so he needed some face shots that weren't his own. I felt so much better after talking to 1SG.


Kale gets on the phone and he lets me know he is pressing charges for identity theft. The guy had taken information about us from Kale's Facebook page, what Kale likes, what I like off my page, he found the picture of Kale's penis and used it. He used Kale's webcam to take pictures of his own penis. He found a dirty letter Kale had written for me and used that on there. Just a complete violation of our privacy.


Like K said, Kale was stupid for leaving his passwords unprotected and letting this guy have so much freedom using his computer. But like I told her, I prefer stupid to cheater, I already knew he was stupid. I can live with stupid. Trust me, stuff like this ONLY happens to Kale. He has the worst luck with things obscure and unusual.


Unfortunately Kale can't get him for identity theft because the guy didn't accrue any debt. BUT the commander is freaking pissed (he's the big boss) and is throwing the book at him. Like I said, they are going for demotion and loss of mid-month pay for 6mths.

It still took me a few days to really get over this. I was angry Kale had left such personal stuff out there for anyone to find. I reminded him that if I had actually sent him the nude photos he requested (I never would have) then those would have been plastered all over that smutty site. That really got to him, he was never as upset as when I told him that. He is very protective of me and it would have killed him to have that all over the internet. It really irritated me that his "business" was on there too and that people commented on it and everything. But in the grand scheme of everything having that to deal with is better than having to deal with a husband who is surfing swinger sites.

He is extremely lucky that he was so far away from me when this happened. If he had been here I would have hunted him down and slapped the shit out of him before he even knew what I was angry about. I have a horrible temper, it's hard to get me angry, but look out when I am.

So, everything is back to "normal" at least as normal as it's going to get. I never worried about him being so far away until all of this happened. Even though my heart knows he wouldn't ever do anything my brain is suspicious. I told him he is going to have to reassure me, every day, multiple times a day until I get over this completely.

The guy has to meet with the Commander and 1SG tonight. His ass is fried. It actually kind of worries me that maybe he is one of those freaks who wants to be you, you know take over your life. I hope it really only was that he didn't want his wife to know he was surfing such sites, but damn that's a long way to go to "get off".

So there is my long, horrifying, detailed (probably more details than most of you wanted), ordeal that has preoccupied my last 7 days. And that is why I was MIA.

9 comments:

Memarie Lane said...

Wow, what a freaking loser. Are they going to talk to his wife?

Stephanie said...

I am pretty sure his wife will be asking why he is losing his rank and half of his pay. He will have a lot of explaining to do. As far as them directly calling her I am not sure. Kale is thinking about sending her an anonymous letter. He is avoiding the guy right now from fear of losing his temper. You are right he is a huge freaking loser, emphasis on FREAK.

KiKi said...

C'mon... who does this kind of crap? If you want to be a freak why not get your own account and do it in private, dummy?

Man did he cause some ruckus, sorry you were stressing.

Stephanie said...

Kiki-
My thoughts exactly! I was stressing hardcore. The silver lining in this whole ordeal was how quickly my husband got answers for me. He didn't want me to have to feel the way I was feeling about him for very long.

United Studies said...

Stephanie, I am SO sorry you had to go through that! If I were you I'd probably already been on a flight down there to kick that guy's A**. I cannot believe he would set up a site like that and use your husband's identity!

United Studies said...

PS - Sorry but I had to giggle at the part about him taking a picture of his p*nis for you.

Stephanie said...

Jacki-

I know, I really should have!

I would have giggled too, if it hadn't been for the way I found out about it. :P

Jennifer said...

OMG!! what the hell is wrong w/ people?? wow. i don't even want to know what is wrong with that guy... he needs some serious help. i'm also glad he is getting in some serious trouble... that is total bullshit to do that to someone that trusted you and befriend you... what the hell?? doesn't he know that Kale has access to guns?? (jk) Wow. that is really a problem or a horrible addiction that ass-hat has.

I'm so glad that you and Kale were able to figure things out so quickly and get right to the bottom of things... it just really SUCKS that you had to go through all this... I know things have been hard enough on you.. to add this to your mind.. ugh. Not fair. That stupid ass had no idea what he was doing... using Kales info just to have a good time... and look what it did to you and your relationship... even if things are all ironed out ... it still put a huge strain on you and things un-necessarily!

I hope his wife does find out... for her own sake and also for the fact that she may beat his ass for doing some sick shit like this...

i hope things are better for you... i know what you mean about knowing in your heart that Kale would never cheat on you... but in your mind you are still wondering things... it is hard to let that shit go... even though it wasn't Kale.

And I totally agree... I would much rather a stupid husband than a cheating one!! lol, but true.

wow. i hope Kale doesn't ever get time alone with that looser... b/c it isn't worth him getting in trouble with his job and all for that shmuck bag.

i had some computer/porn issues with bryan's step-father... ugh. i was pissed... i found...
FREE TEEN PORN... videos on my computer when we first got it and high speed internet... I ripped Bryan a new one and was thinking of moving out... we had JUST moved in together... but he told me how is step father did it... wanting to show him how fast a video could down load with the new internet...

give me a break!! you could watch any video.... free TEEN porn is not right and not going to be on my computer! i'll kill someone... and also everything was in my name... so that shit would have all come back on me... ugh. i was pissed... i knew bryan wasn't like that... but my first thoughts and reactions when i saw it didn't let me rationalize that... i was MAD as hell... so now i never let his stepfather in my house unacompanied and he is NOT allowed to touch my computer... and i don't care if people think i'm a crazy bitch for that or not... do you own thing on your own computer under your own name... who am i to judge you.. but do NOT bring that shit around me and my house and my computer and all that...

I hope you can ease your mind soon... and that you can let this go as much as possible... although if you are anything like me, which I think we are... then it will take a long time for you to ease up on the thoughts of this.

i'm always here for you... i got your email, and i totally understand... and of course my offer stands any time for us to talk.

OH!! and if you need help kicking anyones ass... you know i'm down... i'm a NY girl. :) lol

xoxoxo love ya!!

Jennifer said...

OH!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

and I love the picture of you and Kale!! So sweet!!

( i can't believe that piece of shit would use that picture of you two... what an asshole!!)


xoxoxoxo